This article was written by Anna. She has been working at a Kherson office of Unona for about 2 years.
Summer is the hot time not only for weather in Ukraine, but also for personal tours when many gentlemen come to visit the Ukrainian ladies they have been corresponding with.
The first date is one of the most important moments in a relationship between a man and woman, as you do not get a second chance to make the first impression, and the effect of it may last a lifetime.
Although meeting your lady face to face may sound a little intimidating, keep in mind that this isn't going to be like meeting a stranger for the first time. If both of you have been honest in your profiles and sincere in your letters and have posted pictures of yourselves and have been chatting live, you should recognize each other right away and hopefully feel like old friends who finally got a chance to meet.
Arrangements: It is very important to discuss the dates and the duration of your stay in Ukraine with your lady in advance. Some gentlemen who are anxious to surprise their beloved come to visit unexpectedly, but we have found that this kind of surprise is not usually the best one. Usually ladies want to be ready for meeting in person with several stages preparations to precede (manicure / pedicure, hairdresser, cosmetologist etc.) But most importantly arranging days off, planning care for a child if she has one etc.
If you have been corresponding with several ladies and want to meet all of them, traveling between Ukrainian cities could be a hassle, so you could invite the ladies to come to meet you to the city where you stay. We could help you with arranging ladies’ travel and accommodations in Kiev, Odessa, and other big Ukrainian cities. But again – please tell the ladies about your invitations in advance to make sure that she could plan a few days off and make arrangements. On one hand such a vacation will give more pleasure to both of you, as you will discover the new city together and spend more quality time together, on the other hand there will be no distractions for the lady with her everyday errands.
What to wear? Ukrainian women like to dress up and have European style in clothes (read high heels, dresses, stylish jewelry). You want to be yourself on the first date but at the same time it is a good idea to show your very best self. We would like to suggest styles and clothing for the three kinds of dates: dinner dates, lunch dates and outings/picnics.
For dinner dates: Your lady would be impressed with a good suit and a nice shirt/ a pair of nice trousers and a shirt with a collar and a tie, which will give a relaxed feel but still look good. Do not forget about the right shoes to complete the outfit. Make sure you choose a good pair of leather shoes to complete your sharp look.
For lunch dates: If your first date is going to be a lunch date, you want to opt for somethingcasual, chic and comfortable. V-neck shirts or sweaters look sexy and chic, shirts with collars with or without a tie (think George Clooney in Ocean’s Eleven) look impressive. Designer jeans or dressy pants would look great too. This will show a more creative side than if you were going to wear your average suit.
For outings/picnics: You want to create a very casual look, so think sweaters, cardigans, cargos/jeans and scarves. Choose fun and colorful t-shirts, and don’t be afraid to show your personality.
Compliment your lady on her sharp look when you see her, it will break the ice right away!
What to Do? On a first date most ladies do not mind going for a walk (in fact they love walking) or talking over a cup of tea/coffee in a café. If you spend good time while walking around, you can end the date in a nice restaurant. It is romantic and will give you the opportunity to try Ukrainian cuisine. If Ukrainian cuisine is something new for you, you could ask for advice on what to order. Most Americans still can’t believe how crepes can be served with red caviar instead of maple syrup.
There is another thing I would like to point out in this article. In countries of USA, Canada, Europe often people ask to take the food from the restaurant with you, but they usually do not do it in Ukraine. Several good restaurants of Ukraine also have adopted this practice, but not every. First of all serving sizes in Ukraine are smaller than in North America, second of all we hope you will like our dishes so much, that you will not want to have any leftovers.
“Do you speak English?” Usually Ukrainians study English for a few years at school, so you can expect your lady to speak some English. But for an important meeting, especially if it is your first meeting, we strongly recommend you the assistance of an interpreter. Why not an electronic translator? Unfortunately, there are too many situations when people misunderstood each other because of the lack of personalized translation. Electronic tools can never convey the non-linguistic components of the communication process. Although your ultimate goal is to speak freely with your lady without a third person’s assistance, do not underestimate the power of correct understanding. Especially at a personal level, when you want to establish a good contact with a person which will last in future.
From personal experience as an interpreter, I can add that sometimes details play great role and communication on very limited English is not enough for building quality relationships. It may sound funny, but a lady with poor knowledge of English will not see difference between, for example, you work “as an architect” or “for an architect”.
Long walks along the beach or around the center of the city, a tasty dinner in a good restaurant, an excursion around the city, or a picnic in the countryside – we hope you have really good date. We are sure you forgot about time as all good things come to an end. It is time to suggest your lady to take a taxi for her and… to discuss plans for the second date!
Stay tuned for the next article “Meet the Parents”!